Posts Tagged ‘cakes’
Every Thursday, I post about the things that I love, and God only knows what those things might be.
Lots of things in this world can bring you pleasure – great music, vacation, sex with prostitutes, crack. It’s all part of the rainbow of life. For me, on the short list of things that make me happy is cake.
Not only is it sweet and delicious, but it makes you feel special, like it’s your birthday any day you eat it, and who doesn’t love that!?
When I was a kid, my favorite was chocolate. I still really enjoy a good chocolate devil’s food cake with chocolate icing. I particularly like the devil’s food because I like feeling as if I’m eating something prepared by Satan himself. There’s a comforting feeling knowing the Prince of Darkness got his claws in a mixing bowl and whipped a little dessert just for me. It’s sweet really.
But, my favorite of all is white cake with white icing. This is not a racial thing. I don’t think you should keep black and white separate. In fact, I encourage interracial cakes. Hell, marblize those bastards even. Power to the batter, bitches.
Anyway, white cake with white icing is just fantastic. Don’t leave me near a plain wedding cake or I’ll eat the whole damn thing and even lick the little bride and groom…and the cake topper too – AHTHANKYOU!
Sheet cakes are usually made this way, although I don’t like the whipped cream icing nearly as much as the buttercream. In fact, as my ex-wife will attest, I went through a “sheet cake phase” where I randomly brought home sheet cakes from the store and ate them a little at a time right from the box. That was the summer I gained 75 pounds, suffered a triple coronary and smelled of fondant. Terrifying.
Other cakes high on my list include red velvet, angel food cake (my grandmother made the best version of this), ice cream cake and cheesecake, though that’s more like a pie, but I’m not going to quibble over sugar.
It should be noted that I also love cupcakes. Look, if I love a good sheet cake, why would I discriminate against its tiny little offspring. While I don’t make a practice of eating it regularly, I’m not opposed to veal or lamb, so why would I be adverse to eating baby cakes – and no, that is not the name of a stripper I met in Vegas.
Truth is, that wonderful combination of sugar and flour is hard to beat when it comes to dessert. Sure, ice cream is yummy, chocolate is decadent, pastries are tasty, pies are nom and tarts are tartastic, but cake will always remain king of the dessert heap, even the King Cake they have for Mardis Gras even though it has that crazy plastic baby inside destined to lodge in your throat and kill you if it doesn’t first come to life and stab you in the eyeball.
It’s just like that movie, Chucky Takes the Cake. Ok, maybe not.
Photo by groovehouse.
End of year blog posts are ubiquitous. They’re everywhere. So, naturally, I had to do one as well. Don’t like it, suck it!
I’m kidding. You don’t have to suck anything you don’t want, but, seriously, suck on this.
10: CakeWrecks
I only recently discovered this absolute gem of a blog detailing the many ways deserts can go wrong. Their holiday post is one of the funniest things I’ve read all year. Merrychrist Mas? Let It’s Snow? Marry Christnos? The joy.
Largehearted Boy is my favorite source for daily music links. He always seems to have links to in-depth stories that not only help me get information for Broken Record, but make for good reads as well. One of my favorite music blogs, period.
8. Kings of A&R
I found this cool music blog this year and, like Largehearted Boy, it provides a lot of good information about the music biz. Their post in June about why modern music has lost its impact should be required reading for music bloggers.
7. 30 Days Out
Full disclosure: this blog is written by my dear friend and songwriting partner of many years, George Kovacik, and a friend of his. I’ve written a couple of reviews for them as well. But, truthfully, it is a very well-written blog for a niche of the music world often under-represented online. Give it a read.
For my money, still the funniest celeb/gossip blog on the internet. I aspire to be as funny a writer as the people at the Superficial because they don’t take themselves seriously at all and just have fun. Oh, and it doesn’t hurt that they have pictures of Katy Perry in a bikini. I’m just sayin’.
5. The Blogess
Jenny is one of the honest-to-God funniest people on the planet. When she talks about her finger cancer pinata or posts a conversation between she and her husband, Victor, I rarely make it through a post without a laugh (of the LOL variety even). It’s just a bonus she is from Houston and a very sweet friend.
4. SciGuy
There is NO BETTER hurricane coverage in Houston than what Eric Berger provides for the Chronicle and no better way to follow that coverage than through his SciGuy blog. His painstakingly accurate, thoughtful, calm and often personal discussion of Hurricane Ike was solace for a worried and, ultimately, weary city.
3. Idolator
No longer part of the Gawker Media network that still has #2 on the list and Fleshbot, which I would…cough…NEVER read (more than once a day), Idolator has quickly become my favorite music blog. The posts are insightful and not just re-hashing of things you find on other sites.
2. Jezebel
Jezebel reads as part Cosmo, part Perez Hilton, part Huffington Post and part modern feminist manifesto. It’s refreshing, direct, honest and hysterically funny. The Pot Psychologist videos are some of the funniest viral videos I’ve ever seen and their commentors, at times, rival Defamer.
They are obsessed with bacon, the love streakers and boobs and their name reads like a line from Will Ferrel’s character in Elf. I don’t know how I missed this blog before, but it is a daily read for me and I find myself opening multiple tabs from my Bloglines account to look at all the stories they post. And, for that, they are my #1 blog of 2008.
Congratulations to the winners. You’ve won nothing. That’s not totally true. I think it’s cool and that is worth a million dollars if by “a million dollars” you mean nothing. If that is what you think, then, yay, you’re a millionaire.
